Monday, June 6, 2016

Miss Maggie Matchmaker

Ah, finally, the teen years. Full of excitement and drama! Now that their personality traits actually matter, I'll tell you about them.

Lucy is a Perfectionist, a Virtuoso, Good, and Artistic. She's a bit of a loner, though she isn't actually a Loner like her parents. She just keeps to herself for the most part, studying and painting. She entered her teen years with this horrendous soggy toupee of a haircut, but don't worry, I changed that right away.

Maggie is Brave, Friendly, a Party Animal, and Dramatic. Continuing with the spitfire theme. She has an interesting fashion sense and enjoys writing sci-fi stories. She has this odd blend of tomboy, girly girl, and weird artsy girl going on.

Nathan was swinging in the backyard one afternoon when this woman starts walking toward him from the sidewalk. I moused over her and saw that they were friends, but then when she got to Nathan by the swingset, they immediately attacked each other.

That'll teach you to attack a man on his own turf, lady.

Inside, Molly was cooking dinner and occasionally making this weird face like she was proud of herself for being so damn pro at cooking.

Neighbors using the playground equipment is still a problem. Nathan and Molly are considering expanding the fence to include the entire yard.

These people are total strangers to the Newby family. 

Lucy's picked up the guitar.

But her real interests lie in the visual arts. She's already an experienced painter at 16, and now she wants to try her hand at photography. For that she needs a camera, so she visited the consignment shop hoping to get a sweet still-functioning antique camera or something.

But they only had old books and some reeeeeeeaaaaally old wine.

Nathan's little razorbearded mechanical gnome of invention crossed a line big time.

This might give me nightmares. 

Lucy secretly practices her speech in her room for hours on end. She's determined to be popular.

In this quest for popularity, Maggie decided to throw a party at the beach. She called up all her friends from school, grabbed her boombox, and headed down to the shore, SO READY for this party.

So ready! WOO!

While she was on her way to the beach, she ran into Lucy's friend Ian Bull, who was sporting a really bad dye job and Justin Bieber haircut.

She invited him to the party too, and then everyone arrived all at once and commenced the dancin'.

As a Party Animal, Maggie gets adjectives like awesome, kickin', epic, and sweet attached to her actions. So she doesn't just dance, she does "Kickin' Dance," which disappointingly has nothing to do with Cossacks.

Maggie called up Lucy and told her Ian was at the party and she needed to get her skinny butt down there RIGHT NOW. Lucy got there and said hi to Ian, then called him over to the gazebo to dance.

It was cute and they got along well, but nothing spectacular happened. Ian left shortly after dark, and then Lucy went home because parties aren't really her thing unless there is a boy she likes there.

Then their older brother Sam, who's now a Young Adult, showed up and got really mad about Maggie for some reason.

He just stood there thirty feet from the gazebo and glared at her. Then he smiled, flipped a coin, and left. It was kind of creepy.

But nobody at the party even noticed, because they were too busy having an awesome/sweet/kickin'/epic time.

Of course the party was a raging success and Maggie wants to throw another one as soon as possible.

I actually forgot about the creepy mechanical pervert gnome, until it happened AGAIN.


That was really the last straw. I sold the pervy bastard immediately, and henceforth there shall be no more gnomes in this household.

Maggie really did throw another party as soon as possible, the very next day. This one was a pool party.

Maggie forgot to eat before the party started and she couldn't leave all her guests, so she called up Lucy again and told her to put on her swimsuit, order a pizza, and bring it down to the community pool. Oh, and by the way, Ian was there.

Molly was excited when the pizza guy showed up. She probably thought she was gonna get a piece of that (the pizza, not the pizza guy), but no, Lucy took it straight to the party.

Where Maggie set upon it like a ravenous werewolf, if werewolves ate pizza instead of human flesh and cattle.

Unfortunately, Ian disappeared before Lucy got there, and the party wrapped up soon after. Maggie's determined to get her sister on a date with this boy, though. As far as she's concerned, Lucy wouldn't even have a social life if it weren't for her.

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