Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Maternity Leave

Addie's on maternity leave, which is AWFUL for a Workaholic. A whole week without work! But sims operate in dog years, so it's actually months. Actually, they don't even operate on dog years. It's more like mouse years. Sims are a teenager for about two weeks, and an adult for about 50 days. But when you consider that you can shoot from rank one of a career to the very top of that career in about twelve days if you work hard, it's not so bad. I want someone at Maxis to explain to me how they worked that out. But then I kinda don't, because I'm sure it's arbitrary and ridiculous.

So, to keep her little Workaholic brain happy and sane, she's doing a lot of working from home at the computer.

Suck it, mandatory maternity leave!

Toby spends a lot of time at Addie's now. In the above picture, you can see in the background that he's thinking of ordering a lucky cat statue from the Home Shopping Network.

Much faster than I expected -- in about two days, actually -- Addie goes into labor in the middle of the day, during one of the rare times Toby is at his own apartment. There's no time to call him; TO THE HOSPITAL!

Minutes after Addie leaves for the hospital, Toby knocks on the door. Obviously no one answers, so he leaves. I'm left sitting there staring at an empty house, and I feel like an expectant father in the waiting room. Is it a boy or a girl?! There are no ultrasounds in The Sims. Thankfully, I only have to wait about 45 real-life seconds, about an hour in-game on the fastest speed setting. Man, sims have it easy when it comes to childbirth. What the hell. They don't even have to earn their babies.

A taxi pulls up in front of the house, and I'm pleased to see Toby sitting in the back seat next to Addie. He must have realized what was up and gone to the hospital after he left. Awww. I'm a little less pleased to see that Addie might not be off to the greatest start, parenting-wise.

Last time I checked, it was bad form to hold your newborn infant casually in one arm while in a moving vehicle. Or is that how they do it? I wouldn't know, I've never witnessed a baby being brought home.

Toby, in the meantime, has decided to move in. He brings with him $15,000 and a car, which they sell for another $4,500. That's a nice chunk of baby-raising cash. They'll need it to either add on to their house or buy a bigger one, since they currently only have one bedroom.

As soon as Toby moved in (therefore as soon as I gained control over his actions), Addie gave him a makeover. New outfits all around, but he wouldn't let her cut his hair. He's still looking a lot less goofy, though.

Addie also started training Toby on the treadmill. At first, things were a little rough.

But he soon got the hang of it. Then a few days later I noticed he was running on the treadmill all on his own, and I noticed something.

Daaang, Toby, you lookin' fine. I mean, that guy is HUNKY now. Not only is he totally buff, but when he moved in, his other two personality traits (besides Neat, Over-Emotional, and Couch Potato) were revealed. Toby is also Brave and Friendly. And hey, when you think about it, the other three aren't so bad. A Neat guy will clean the house on his own; Toby's already making the bed every morning and cleaning the bathroom regularly. And "Over-Emotional" could just mean sensitive. Women always want sensitive dudes! And, well, a dude's allowed to be a Couch Potato. Let this be a lesson to you, ladies. Sometimes a crunchy, frumpy coating can hide a delicious, chewy, muscular, chore-doing, sensitive, brave and friendly center.

DANGIT ADDIE, PAY YOUR FREAKIN' BILLS. This is a different repo girl. I don't know what happened to old terrified nailbiter. Maybe she decided repossessing things was too stressful, since she was terrified constantly. I'd quit my job if every five minutes it had me hunched, cowering in fear. I guess the mystery of what was scaring her will just have to go unsolved.

Oh, right, they have a baby and everything. Sorry, I kinda forgot, because babies are boring. WHAT, don't give me that look. They are. They lay around all day and do nothing except when they're hungry or poopy or lonely, and then they cry until you fix whatever's wrong, and then they go back to sleeping and drooling everywhere. Anyway, they named the baby Eddie. I haven't decided if it's short for Edward or Eduardo, because Addie looks kinda Mexican.

Addie needs to submit more reports to the police station. To do that, she needs to question more people. I'm lazy, so I have her go see if she can question the next-door neighbors again. Things may have... developed, or something. She heads over to Pauline and Hank's house. It turns out they have another visitor at that very moment: Starla Newby. Toby's teenage daughter.

Starla surprisingly does not want to rip Addie's guts out for destroying her home life and causing her parents to split up. Addie learns that Starla is a Virtuoso (musically talented), a Heavy Sleeper, and Insane. Jesus H., an insane teenage daughter? No wonder Toby was so eager to leave home. I wonder what fun traits Lauren Newby is hiding up her sleeves.

Meeting a new person is convenient for Addie, because she gets to question her! However, just as Addie's busting out the notepad and bright orange pen, Starla wanders off. Maybe she saw something shiny in the distance, or the voices told her to do it. I dunno, bitch is crazy.

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